Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Its been a while, but I need to update for prayers
My dear friend Trudie is an amazing mother that I have had the pleasure of knowing for over 4 years now. She has 4 boys and 1 girls and was amazed to find out she was expecting again, she had a few scares in the beginning, but everything was fine. She went yesterday for her gender scan and discovered that her little boy had died a few days prior. She is being induced today to deliver Hudson Zachary and they will make plans from there. Trudie lives across the globe in Australia, so if you can spare some prayers for her, I would greatly appreciate it. And those of you who have been in similar situations, please let me know if she can contact you. God Bless you Trudie. Praying so hard for you sweetheart.
Monday, April 27, 2009
It is National Infertility Awareness Week!
Thanks to a friend I met on facebook, Amy Hibbard from VA, I am now aware that this week - April 25-May 2 is National Infertility Awareness Week. Amy and I are both infertility survivors. If you are someone suffering from infertility or know someone suffering from it... reach out or reach out to them. Infertility is a lonely, isolating process that consumes your life at the time you are going through. Please know there is hope and to never give up on your dreams. I love my infertility gals and even though I have my girls, I will never forget the need and ache in my heart until I had them in my arms.
Thinking of all the infertility couples fighting the battle right now. Love, baby dust and prayers to all.
Beck
Infertility and Multiple Miscarriage Survivor 2001-2006
Angel Babies May 2002 8 weeks, Nov. 2004 11 weeks, July 2008 12 weeks and Jan. 2009 (Eptopic) 5 weeks.
Here is a great website about it:
https://secure2.convio.net/res/site/SPageServer?pagename=evt_niaw09_home&JServSessionIdr010=0almblrhv1.app45b
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Pregnancy Loss and Miscarriage Myths
Having 4 miscarriages... I have often wondered there is something I have done wrong... or something was terribly wrong with my body or what not. So I went out searching for answers. Here is a good list of things that DO NOT casue miscarriages or pregnancy loss. In my opinion, the most important message is that YOU did not make it happen. No matter what.
There are a lot of myths that surround pregnancy loss. To better understand pregnancy loss, it's important to understand the things that don't cause a woman to miscarry.
Miscarriages in early pregnancy are not caused by:
exercising
working
travelling
having sex
eating the "wrong" food
drinking alcohol (but don't if you know you are pregnant)
morning sickness
using birth control pills before or after you got pregnant
a fall, a blow or a fright
stress or worry
wondering whether or not you wanted the baby
having previously had an abortion.
It's important to remember that these factors do not cause pregnancy loss in the first 12 weeks - despite some popular beliefs to the contrary. It's also important to remember that, as heartbreaking as it is, pregnancy loss is not uncommon. In many cases, it is nature's way of preventing a pregnancy that is not developing as it should.
There are a lot of myths that surround pregnancy loss. To better understand pregnancy loss, it's important to understand the things that don't cause a woman to miscarry.
Miscarriages in early pregnancy are not caused by:
exercising
working
travelling
having sex
eating the "wrong" food
drinking alcohol (but don't if you know you are pregnant)
morning sickness
using birth control pills before or after you got pregnant
a fall, a blow or a fright
stress or worry
wondering whether or not you wanted the baby
having previously had an abortion.
It's important to remember that these factors do not cause pregnancy loss in the first 12 weeks - despite some popular beliefs to the contrary. It's also important to remember that, as heartbreaking as it is, pregnancy loss is not uncommon. In many cases, it is nature's way of preventing a pregnancy that is not developing as it should.
Infertility Myths.... a collection from internet searches
Here are some info I found on the internet covering lots of different ttpes of myths and questions. One of the most infuriating things I delt with were people telling me "to relax, it will happen".... someone who has said that has never been where an infertility person has been. During treatment especially.... you can think of NOTHING else. I hope this also helps people become more aware of the sensitivity you should use when dealing with a friend who is suffering through infertility.
Infertility is primarily caused by female problems.
Studies show that about 40% of infertility cases are caused by female factors, 40% by male factors and 20% by a combination of both.
Ovulation occurs on Day 14 of a woman's cycle.
That would make birth control, and conception, very easy if it were true. Couples could either avoid intercourse on Day 14 to avoid pregnancy, or have intercourse to become pregnant.
A normal menstrual cycle lasts 28 days.
The normal range for a woman's menstrual cycle is actually anywhere between 24 to 36 days in length.
Worrying about a late period only makes it later.
Stress cannot delay your menstrual period, however it can delay ovulation. The number of days in your luteal phase (time between ovulation and your period) typically will remain constant with each cycle.
A woman can get pregnant only on one day during each cycle.
Although a woman's egg is only viable for 12 to 24 hours, she can actually get pregnant from an act of intercourse that occurs anytime from about five days prior to ovulation to as much as two days after, for a total of about seven possible days to get pregnant.
A woman should wait a minimum of three months after she stops taking birth control pills before trying to conceive.
Birth control pills work by preventing a woman from ovulating through increased hormone levels. The hormone levels start to return to normal almost immediately once you quit taking them and you should begin to ovulate with the very next cycle.
Stress can cause infertility.
Stress does not prevent conception, however, it can delay ovulation by suppressing the hormones needed for it to occur.
It's all in your mind - just relax or take a vacation. Then you'll get pregnant! (This was the one that always bothered me the most!)
Infertility is a disease or condition of the reproductive system. Although infertility can result in stress, stress cannot cause infertility. Luckily, improved medical techniques have made it easier to diagnose and treat infertility problems.
The egg is fertilized within the uterus.
Implantation usually occurs in the uterus, but conception actually occurs in the outer third of the fallopian tubes, not in the uterus.
Women stop producing eggs at menopause.
Women are born with over 400,000 eggs, but have nowhere near that many menstrual cycles in their lives. Once a woman reaches menopause, her body stops responding to the hormones that cause the eggs to mature in the ovary and be released.
Wearing boxer shorts and taking cold showers makes men more fertile.
While increased scrotal heat from athletic supporters, tight-fitting underwear and hot tubs can reduce a man's sperm count, there are no proven benefits of keeping the area cold.
If a woman takes fertility drugs to help conceive, she'll end up having twins or triplets.
Although fertility drugs can increase the chances of having a multiple pregnancy, the majority of women taking them have single births.
Ovulation occurs on the day of the drop or the day of the rise in your BBT chart.
Actually, the exact day of ovulation cannot be determined by the basal body temperature. By the time the temperature has risen, ovulation has already occurred and since the egg can live for 12-24 hours, the temperature alone is not a good indicator of when you actually ovulated.
Vaginal secretions indicate that you have an infection.
Vaginal secretions are natural and healthy and once a woman understands what it is and when to expect it, she will realize that it is a sign of fertility and not an infectious discharge in need of treatment or douching.
If a man is sexually virile, he will have a normal sperm count.
In reality, men with normal sex drives may have no sperm at all and vice versa as there is no correlation between virility and fertility.
Sperm can only live for several hours.
In fertile quality cervical fluid, sperm can actually survive for up to five days in a woman's reproductive system.
Myth: It's easy to get pregnant.
For many people, it's not easy. Yet, friends and family often still put undue pressure on couples with the "what's wrong with you?" syndrome.
Myth: Having sex every day will increase our chances of conceiving.
The truth is that timing sex during the most fertile days of a woman's monthly cycle will increase your chances — not how many times you have sex. Generally, the best time to try to conceive is during the 11 - 17th days of a woman's menstrual cycle based on a 28-day cycle. Since a man's sperm can live for 48 - 72 hours in a woman's reproductive tract, intercourse every other day during this period is recommended. A study found no difference in pregnancy rates between couples that had sex daily and those who had sex every other day.[1]
Myth: A woman's menstrual cycle begins when she starts spotting.
Close, but wrong. If you're trying to time intercourse, it's critical to identify the first day of your reproductive cycle. Start counting on the first day of normal bleeding or full flow, not when spotting begins. Being off by just a day or two can make a big difference.
Myth: A woman can't get pregnant if she doesn't have an orgasm.
Getting pregnant has nothing to do with a woman having an orgasm. Conception occurs when a man's sperm fertilizes a woman's egg.
Myth: I can wait until I'm 40 to conceive.
When you choose to start a family is up to you. But as you make your decision, you should be aware of some basic fertility facts. A man's fertility drops after age 35.[2] A healthy woman at age thirty has about a 20% chance per month of conceiving. By the time she reaches forty, her chances drop to about 5% per month.[3]
Getting pregnant — at any age — is not an automatic. And as you get older, it may become increasingly difficult to conceive - despite all the stories you've heard in the media. Infertility is defined as the inability to conceive after regular, unprotected intercourse after 12 months (or 6 months if a woman is over 35). It's important to talk to a healthcare provider whenever you're concerned about your ability to conceive. Some people talk with their Primary Care Physician, others with an OB/GYN, and some go directly to a Fertility Specialist, also called a Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE). Find a Fertility Specialist, Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE), in your area.
Myth: We've already had one child, so conceiving again will be easy.
Perhaps, but it's no guarantee. Many Americans experience secondary infertility, or difficulty conceiving a second or subsequent child. This problem is often caused by age-related factors.
Infertility is primarily caused by female problems.
Studies show that about 40% of infertility cases are caused by female factors, 40% by male factors and 20% by a combination of both.
Ovulation occurs on Day 14 of a woman's cycle.
That would make birth control, and conception, very easy if it were true. Couples could either avoid intercourse on Day 14 to avoid pregnancy, or have intercourse to become pregnant.
A normal menstrual cycle lasts 28 days.
The normal range for a woman's menstrual cycle is actually anywhere between 24 to 36 days in length.
Worrying about a late period only makes it later.
Stress cannot delay your menstrual period, however it can delay ovulation. The number of days in your luteal phase (time between ovulation and your period) typically will remain constant with each cycle.
A woman can get pregnant only on one day during each cycle.
Although a woman's egg is only viable for 12 to 24 hours, she can actually get pregnant from an act of intercourse that occurs anytime from about five days prior to ovulation to as much as two days after, for a total of about seven possible days to get pregnant.
A woman should wait a minimum of three months after she stops taking birth control pills before trying to conceive.
Birth control pills work by preventing a woman from ovulating through increased hormone levels. The hormone levels start to return to normal almost immediately once you quit taking them and you should begin to ovulate with the very next cycle.
Stress can cause infertility.
Stress does not prevent conception, however, it can delay ovulation by suppressing the hormones needed for it to occur.
It's all in your mind - just relax or take a vacation. Then you'll get pregnant! (This was the one that always bothered me the most!)
Infertility is a disease or condition of the reproductive system. Although infertility can result in stress, stress cannot cause infertility. Luckily, improved medical techniques have made it easier to diagnose and treat infertility problems.
The egg is fertilized within the uterus.
Implantation usually occurs in the uterus, but conception actually occurs in the outer third of the fallopian tubes, not in the uterus.
Women stop producing eggs at menopause.
Women are born with over 400,000 eggs, but have nowhere near that many menstrual cycles in their lives. Once a woman reaches menopause, her body stops responding to the hormones that cause the eggs to mature in the ovary and be released.
Wearing boxer shorts and taking cold showers makes men more fertile.
While increased scrotal heat from athletic supporters, tight-fitting underwear and hot tubs can reduce a man's sperm count, there are no proven benefits of keeping the area cold.
If a woman takes fertility drugs to help conceive, she'll end up having twins or triplets.
Although fertility drugs can increase the chances of having a multiple pregnancy, the majority of women taking them have single births.
Ovulation occurs on the day of the drop or the day of the rise in your BBT chart.
Actually, the exact day of ovulation cannot be determined by the basal body temperature. By the time the temperature has risen, ovulation has already occurred and since the egg can live for 12-24 hours, the temperature alone is not a good indicator of when you actually ovulated.
Vaginal secretions indicate that you have an infection.
Vaginal secretions are natural and healthy and once a woman understands what it is and when to expect it, she will realize that it is a sign of fertility and not an infectious discharge in need of treatment or douching.
If a man is sexually virile, he will have a normal sperm count.
In reality, men with normal sex drives may have no sperm at all and vice versa as there is no correlation between virility and fertility.
Sperm can only live for several hours.
In fertile quality cervical fluid, sperm can actually survive for up to five days in a woman's reproductive system.
Myth: It's easy to get pregnant.
For many people, it's not easy. Yet, friends and family often still put undue pressure on couples with the "what's wrong with you?" syndrome.
Myth: Having sex every day will increase our chances of conceiving.
The truth is that timing sex during the most fertile days of a woman's monthly cycle will increase your chances — not how many times you have sex. Generally, the best time to try to conceive is during the 11 - 17th days of a woman's menstrual cycle based on a 28-day cycle. Since a man's sperm can live for 48 - 72 hours in a woman's reproductive tract, intercourse every other day during this period is recommended. A study found no difference in pregnancy rates between couples that had sex daily and those who had sex every other day.[1]
Myth: A woman's menstrual cycle begins when she starts spotting.
Close, but wrong. If you're trying to time intercourse, it's critical to identify the first day of your reproductive cycle. Start counting on the first day of normal bleeding or full flow, not when spotting begins. Being off by just a day or two can make a big difference.
Myth: A woman can't get pregnant if she doesn't have an orgasm.
Getting pregnant has nothing to do with a woman having an orgasm. Conception occurs when a man's sperm fertilizes a woman's egg.
Myth: I can wait until I'm 40 to conceive.
When you choose to start a family is up to you. But as you make your decision, you should be aware of some basic fertility facts. A man's fertility drops after age 35.[2] A healthy woman at age thirty has about a 20% chance per month of conceiving. By the time she reaches forty, her chances drop to about 5% per month.[3]
Getting pregnant — at any age — is not an automatic. And as you get older, it may become increasingly difficult to conceive - despite all the stories you've heard in the media. Infertility is defined as the inability to conceive after regular, unprotected intercourse after 12 months (or 6 months if a woman is over 35). It's important to talk to a healthcare provider whenever you're concerned about your ability to conceive. Some people talk with their Primary Care Physician, others with an OB/GYN, and some go directly to a Fertility Specialist, also called a Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE). Find a Fertility Specialist, Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE), in your area.
Myth: We've already had one child, so conceiving again will be easy.
Perhaps, but it's no guarantee. Many Americans experience secondary infertility, or difficulty conceiving a second or subsequent child. This problem is often caused by age-related factors.
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Wonderful news!!!
When ever someone got pregnant on one of my message boards, we called them TTC Grads. Well, we officially have a graduate.... times two! My wonderful friend and sorority sister Amber has become a TTC grad.... and she is having two babies!!!!!!! Twins are in her belly baking away at 15 weeks. I am so thrilled I cannot put it into words!!! They are pretty sure they are fraternal because they have their own placentas. I ask you to join me in praying for Amber and her beautiful babies and keep them as well as Amber safe and healthy.
Amber - I am thrilled for you and your miracle babies and I am so happy this finally happened for you TIMES TWO!!!!!
Amber - I am thrilled for you and your miracle babies and I am so happy this finally happened for you TIMES TWO!!!!!
Saturday, February 21, 2009
More prayers and thoughts needed
I just found out last night tht Preston and I's friend Tamika and her husband Gesner lost their baby at 19 weeks on Thursday. I dont know the details yet, but it had something to do with an infection. Tamika is still in the hospital fighting the infection that took her baby. Please send loads and loads of prayers their way. I know some of our followers have had to endure this awful situation, so please please think of Tamika and pray that God grants her and Gesner some peace in this horrible time. Thanks!
Sometimes it seems to pour down when one thing happens, but I am still very hopeful for our sweet Mamas that are having such a hard time getting pregnant as well as our Mamas that are dealing with the loss of a baby. I dont always think it is fair, but after all is said and done, God will guide you to where you are supposed to be in life.
I think a lot about Janna (http://randyandjanna.blogspot.com/) in this situation who lost her sweet baby at 17 weeks and accredits her angel with saving the life of her next baby decause of the manner she lost her angel. If she had not lost her angel she would have not known of her issue with her cervix dialting on its own and was able to have a successful cerlage (sewing the cervix shut) and has her baby boy Kason who is happy and healthy and almost 8 months!
Lots of love, baby dust, peace and prayers to all my girls.
Sometimes it seems to pour down when one thing happens, but I am still very hopeful for our sweet Mamas that are having such a hard time getting pregnant as well as our Mamas that are dealing with the loss of a baby. I dont always think it is fair, but after all is said and done, God will guide you to where you are supposed to be in life.
I think a lot about Janna (http://randyandjanna.blogspot.com/) in this situation who lost her sweet baby at 17 weeks and accredits her angel with saving the life of her next baby decause of the manner she lost her angel. If she had not lost her angel she would have not known of her issue with her cervix dialting on its own and was able to have a successful cerlage (sewing the cervix shut) and has her baby boy Kason who is happy and healthy and almost 8 months!
Lots of love, baby dust, peace and prayers to all my girls.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Sending out love and prayers
I was saddened to hear another one of our blog followers has lost her first baby, she is not ready to discuss it yet, since it is too recent. I am so sorry for your loss and want you to know please take the time you need to grieve. You are very loved and surrounded. Take all the time you need, when you are ready, I am here.
It is hard for people who have not lost a baby during pregnancy to understand the feeling that surrounds it as well as the people that surround you. There is never the perfect thing to say or do. Just make sure they know you love them and are there for them whenever they need you. After my second miscarriage, I began to notice how "taboo" people considered a pregnancy loss. To me, that was ridiculous. It implies that it should be secretive or almost guilty. Obviously, none of that is true, but it is a very difficult thing to figure out in your head. Everyone does it differently.
Please know my dear friend that I love you very much and are here when you are ready and I hate that you are going through this. I would not wish it upon even a sworn enemy. I love you.
It is hard for people who have not lost a baby during pregnancy to understand the feeling that surrounds it as well as the people that surround you. There is never the perfect thing to say or do. Just make sure they know you love them and are there for them whenever they need you. After my second miscarriage, I began to notice how "taboo" people considered a pregnancy loss. To me, that was ridiculous. It implies that it should be secretive or almost guilty. Obviously, none of that is true, but it is a very difficult thing to figure out in your head. Everyone does it differently.
Please know my dear friend that I love you very much and are here when you are ready and I hate that you are going through this. I would not wish it upon even a sworn enemy. I love you.
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